


Easy

by BigWordsAndSuch



Series: The Pillow Fort Series [2]
Category: Atypical (TV 2017), Netflix - Fandom
Genre: F/F, Season 3
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-03
Updated: 2020-09-23
Packaged: 2021-01-20 23:41:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21290102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BigWordsAndSuch/pseuds/BigWordsAndSuch
Summary: Sequel to "I Don't Want to Lose"Season 3 from Izzie's Perspective.
Relationships: Casey Gardner & Izzie, Casey Gardner/Izzie, Cazzie - Relationship
Series: The Pillow Fort Series [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1542709
Comments: 44
Kudos: 330





	1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Izzie leaned her head on the backseat window of her grandma's car. Her flight from Florida was long, and the 45 minute drive from the airport felt even longer. She couldn't wait to see Casey. She left to visit her aunt and uncle the day after Slurpee night, and they haven't really talked since.

  
_Slurpee Night_

  
After Casey ignored Evan's call, a marathon of text messages appeared on Casey's screen. In an effort to respond to them, Casey finally pulled her hand away, and the lack of contact immediately startled Izzie.

  
"Is everything okay?"

  
"It's Elsa."

  
Thank God.She didn't pull her hand away for Evan, but did for her mom. That has to mean something right?

  
"Hi, honey bear. Bear emoji. Can you please pick up a fire extinguisher on the way home?

  
A look of confusion made it's way to Izzie's face. Why would Elsa need a fire extinguisher? Also, was this an emergency or no? Could they stay or should they-

  
"Yeah, so we should probably... "

  
_Go_

  
"Yeah."

  
Izzie couldn't help but laugh..what was this night? She once again, felt herself acting on her impulses. She liked Casey's new nickname, and even though she wished she hadn't said anything she did...

  
"Let's go, honey bear."

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
It had been weeks since that night, and it hadn't been brought up since. Izzie was more confused about her feelings than ever, but one thing still held true. She couldn't lose Casey, even if it meant just having her as a friend.

  
All 3 kids tackled her to the floor as she walked in the door. Her mother sat on the couch watching Judge Judy repeats.

  
"Welcome home honey. How was my sister's fancy house on the beach?"

  
Her Aunt and Uncles house wasn't actually on the beach, but it was close enough to run to. Izzie ran to and from the beach every day. And usually spent a large portion of it running on the beach. It was hot and horrible, but running on sand, makes running literally anywhere else, a lot easier.

  
"It was fine."

  
Izzie's mom was not pleased that her main source of free babysitting left for weeks. She had no choice but to be a parent, and she would always be resentful to Izzie for that. Why wouldn't she? Izzie was the one that forced her to become a parent in the first place. She carried her bags to her room, and as soon as the door shut, she pulled out her phone.

  
**I'm Home!!! Run?**

  
**Newton: It's about damn time!! I'll meet you in 30!**

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Izzie and Casey ran side by side through town. Casey wore a bright yellow tank top, and Izzie didn't know if she noticed because she herself was in a sweatshirt (70's felt like freezing temperatures after a few weeks in the Florida summer heat) or because they showed off the taller girls arms.

  
"It is so good to be back. I love my aunt and uncle, and Florida is nice, but after a while, I don't love them that much, and Florida isn't that nice."

  
It was true, Florida is great, until you are in Florida, and her aunt and uncle were almost too present the entire time. Izzie wasn't used to having an adult want to know where she was 24/7. To be honest, Izzie spend most of her time thinking about how much she missed Casey. This run had been awkward, and quiet. Izzie was glad when Casey decided to join the conversation.

  
"I feel like I haven't seen you in forever."

  
"I know. Since Slurpee night."

  
_Slurpee Night_

  
Izzie thought back to their pinkies intertwined

  
"Yeah, Slurpee night. That was fun."

  
She felt the electricity of their touch in her fingertips.

  
"So fun."

  
She needed to get her head out of this mind space. She needed to do what was best for both of them. She needed to put both of them in the friend zone.

  
"I'm so glad I have a friend like you.I haven't had a best girlfriend since I was little."

  
This was true. Izzie hadn't had many friends at all, but she rarely even tried to have best friends that were girls anymore. Girls were just so judgmental.

  
"It's nice....Easy."

  
Everything with Casey was easy. The way they talked, the way they worked out, the way that Izzie could always be herself without fear of any judgement. Casey made Izzie's life easier, and she hoped that she did the same for the taller girl as well.

  
"Yeah, easy."

  
"Totally easy."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
It had been 24 hours and 13 minutes since their run had ended and despite multiple texts sent, Izzie had not heard from Casey. Deep down she knew that Casey was probably with Evan, and that she needed to give them their space. She was trying to be supportive, but it still hurt. Finally her phone vibrated on her desk.

  
**Casey: Hey! Sorry I haven't answered. Funny Story, I was in emergency surgery.**

  
**WTF Newton!! **

  
**Are you okay? **

  
**What happened? **

  
**When can I see you? **

  
**Are you okay?**

  
**Casey: Woah woah woah. I'm fine. I just had to get my appendix out. Fortunately for you, I am on bed rest for 6 weeks. You might have a chance at beating my times this season now.**

  
_She thinks she so funny_

  
**I'm just glad you are alright! Can I come see you!?**

  
**Casey: YES PLEASE!!!!**

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Izzie approached Casey's room with Twizzlers in hand. They were all she had the house, and honestly she couldn't even think about stopping anywhere that would just delay her getting to Casey. She looked into the room to see the taller girl laying upright in bed, with a small blanket covering her. She still looked like a hospital patient. Izzie tapped on the door gently.

  
"Knock Knock"

  
"Oh, thank God, I'm so bored."

  
She must have been bored, she was reading a cooking magazine. Izzie wasn't sure if Casey even knew how to cook!

  
"You look pathetic."

  
Casey stuck out her bottom lip. She didn't look pathetic, she looked adorable. Izzie pulled the candy from its hiding place behind her back, and set it on the nightstand next the the bed.

  
"I brought Twizzlers."

  
"You brought me your favorite candy?"

  
"You're welcome. Scooch."

  
Izzie was already taking her shoes off, as she made her way into the queen sized bed. She stole half of the small blanket from Casey. This was the first time the two girls where this close to each other since Slurpee night. Izzie could feel the heat from Casey's skin.

  
"Your bed is so cozy and warm."

  
"It's all the farting I've been doing."

  
"You're so gross."

  
"You didn't know that?"

  
Izzie looked up to see a familiar face in the bedroom door way.

  
_Ugh Evan.._

She Had to remind her self to be nice.

  
"Evan."

  
"Hey."

  
Evan made his way into the room holding a small, terrifying looking sheep in his hand.

  
"No more appendix?

  
"It's all gone. I miss it."

  
He slowly started to walk towards the vacant side of the bed.

  
"I'm sorry. Now that banana bread incident is starting to make a lot more sense: Your appendix hated banana bread."

  
Evan leaned in and kissed Casey. It felt like someone punched her in the stomach. She was trying to be a good friend, but she didn't want to see this.

  
"Maybe I should go."

  
"No, stay. I need my loved ones around me. We don't know how much time I have left."

  
_Then i guess i should stay._

  
Evan extended his arm towards Casey.

  
"I got you this."

  
" A sheep?"

  
"Yeah."

  
"It's a little weird, - but there's a story behind it."

  
Izzie didn't mean to interrupt, but she did.

  
"Super weird."

  
The small knitted sheep, had a face so angry, Izzie could have sworn it had rabies. Casey clearly agreed.

  
"Oh, my God, look at it, it's angry."

  
"It's so angry. Get it away!"

  
Izzie grabbed the small stuffed sheep and added to to the pile of gifts on the night stand. Casey grabbed her laptop from the end of the bed.

  
"Movie time?"

  
Izzie and Casey cuddled more into each other so they both had a good view of the tiny screen.

  
"Yep. Get in."

  
The taller girl patted on the bed as a request for Evan to join them, and offered him the very little amount of blanket she still had control to offer. It wasn't even enough to cover the small sheep.

  
"Here."

  
Evan small offering but not without noticing that the rest of the blanket was being shared with Izzie.

  
"Thank you."

  
_I already have to share her with you, that should be enough._

  
" Okay, guys."

  
"What have we got?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
  
Izzie felt herself wake up, the arm that she had been using as a pillow was no longer there, and the warmth that came with it was gone as well. She saw Casey walk to the bathroom, and heard Sam walking in his room. She felt Evan move and get out of bed as she kept her eyes shut. It wasn't until he was in the hall that she allowed herself to sit up. She grabbed her phone from the night stand as Casey walked back into the room.

  
"Where's Evan?"

  
_Downstairs_

  
"I don't know."

  
Casey walked into the hallway and followed the path of Evan. Izzie didn't want to know what was happening downstairs. So instead she opened Instagram. The first post was a picture of Sam and Paige outside of a restaurant with the caption "We are taking back the @olivegarden." She was proud of Sam. Having a relationship was something most people not on the spectrum had a hard time with.

  
Casey quietly opened her bedroom door and walked back into the room. She looks confident and stoic.

  
"Everything okay?"

  
"Yeah. He just had to get home."

  
_Finally, its just us._

  
"Um, hey. I'm gonna sleep over at Evan's next weekend. You think you could cover for me?"

  
If Izzie felt like she was getting punched in the stomach before, this was more like getting hit by a train. She didn't want to know these things, and she certainly didn't want to help them happen. But, she did have a job to do, and a promise that she made to herself to keep.

  
_Be a good friend. Be a good friend._

  
"Um... Yeah...Yeah."

  
"Cool."

  
_This was not going to be easy._


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the first day of junior year!

Chapter 2

It had been almost six weeks since Casey's surgery, and although covering for her that first weekend had been hard, Izzie did what was right and followed through. Since then, she had spent almost every day at Casey's. Whenever Evan was at work, Izzie was with Casey. She had quickly become a regular at the Gardner household as they spent most of the summer lounging inside. Casey couldn't run, so they watched a lot of TV, and slowly started to work out more and more as the weeks went on. Even if they were sitting on the couch doing nothing, Izzie loved every second of it. 

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Izzie looked in the mirror. She had somehow forgotten how much she hated the Clayton uniforms. They were so... ugly. There was only one person that could make it look cute, and she hadn't seen her in two days. The last few days Izzie had spent making sure her siblings had everything they needed for their first day of school. Normally, she would find it annoying to have to be the responsible one, but Evan had the day off from work anyway, so she had nothing better to do. 

"IZZIE IZZIE! Look at my uniform! I look just like you!"

Gwen proudly stood in front of her older sister. Today was her first day of kindergarten and she, along with her older brother Mike, would be attending the local charter school. Their school colors matched Clayton Prep’s, and Izzie couldn't help but laugh at how much the two looked alike. She prayed that they have a good day. Izzie went to the same charter school before getting her scholarship, and it wasn't the best place to learn. There were a lot of kids who did alot of bad things. They got their funding based on enrollment, which meant that kids rarely got expelled. Even massive fights or more violent acts only resulted in a suspension. Before Izzie found running, she hung around a more rebelious group of kids. Luckily, Clayton Prep offered her an escape before things got too bad. She hoped her younger siblings didn't take the same path. 

"Come on, Mini Me. Let’s get you on the bus."

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
Izzie leaned up against the closed lockers as Casey unlocked hers. The girls had driven separately, but decided to meet at Casey's locker to take on the first day together.

"So, junior year. You ready?"

Just as Casey turned to respond, Nate walked in between them silently. He forcefully opened his locker, grabbed what he needed, and slammed it shut as he walked away without saying a word.

"You mean ten months of that awkwardness? Can't wait."

Casey shut her locker and both girls started to walk to Chemistry class. Izzie was half a step quicker and she stepped into Casey's personal space as they moved. The closeness took her breath away for a split second.

"He's harmless"

  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Casey's locker was quickly becoming the place to be in between classes. The girls had even discussed just putting some of Izzie's books in there, too, to save time, especially her Math book, since the classroom was right next to Casey's locker. 

"It kinda sucks you just had surgery. It's not gonna be as fun kicking your ass at practice."

"I'll have you know I went on my first run, and I'm as fast as ever."

Izzie knew Casey was only five and a half weeks into her six-week recovery time. Casey shouldn't have run, but even Izzie knew how impossible it was to stay away.

"Did it hurt?" Izzie already knew the answer to the question.

"Like a bitch."

As the girls turned to walk towards lunch, Izzie saw Nate, with three cups in his hands. 

"Hey, I brought you guys milkshakes."

Izzie thought Nate would be more than over their breakup by now. But based on his behavior earlier, clearly he wasn't, and she wasn't sure if she could trust his motives.

"I don't want it to be weird with us for the next two years, so peace offering."

Izzie eyed the cups. It was chocolate, her favorite.

"Thanks. My stomach's still a little wonky from the appendectomy, but-" 

"I'll take it."

_Who am I to turn down free milkshakes?_

"Hers, too."

Casey let a small laugh slip as Nate handed Izzie both cups and straws. She accepted and started making her way towards the student lounge.

"Thank you"

Moments later, Izzie felt someone walk very close behind her. She felt the soft wind of someone whispering in her ear.

"Act cool, act normal. Just keep walking"

Izzie turned her head to see Casey grinning ear to ear. She knew the taller girl was up to something.

"What did you do?"

"What makes you think I did anything?"

Izzie didn't even have to respond with words. 

"Okay. I may have bopped Nate's milkshake all over him."

Casey reenacted the motions and Izzie's laughter overcame her.

"You punched his milkshake all over him? That's classic!"

"Not punched! Bopped! There is a huge difference" 

Suddenly, a voice filled the halls.

"GARDNER!"

_Coach Crowley is going to kill her._

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Hey Newton!! 7-11 run tonight?**

The girls did a lot of nothing all summer, but one thing they definitely did not do was get slurpees. That night and everything about it had become silently sacred to both of them. But Izzie had to move past that, and the only way to make it normal again was to act like it meant nothing. 

**Newton: Can't tonight, I'm casing a joint with Sam!**

**Am I supposed to know what any of that means?**

**Newton: Sam wants to live in the dorms, but before he commits we are going to scope the place out. Ya know? See if he can handle it. **

**That actually makes a lot of sense! How's it going so far?**   
  
**Newton: Not great. Sam thought he made friends, turns out they are jerks. I think he’s better off without them. His roommate seems cool though.**

**Newton: I told him about my first day at Clayton. How awful it was...**

A pain hit Izzie's heart. She was the one that caused that awful time for Casey.

**I'm sorry for everything that happened then. I wish I could take it all back. You deserved better than that. **

**Newton: It's all good, you came around! Besides, now I get to be an emotional support human.**

_A what?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like it let me know!!
> 
> I want to give a huge shout out to @tillthestarsevaporate for proofreading this chapter!!
> 
> Just like last "season" I am going to try and post every Sunday. However, my laptop is slowly dying of old age, so if there are delays, that would be why!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzie deals with her mom and comes up with a plan!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUESS WHO'S BACK!
> 
> Things got pretty crazy for a while there.  
The holidays happened, I moved, crushed happened, heartbreak ensued, and now there is a literal plague. This is what the world is like when atypical isn't on! 
> 
> I am really going to try and get in the habit of new chapters once a week, but i need you all to hold me accountable!!

Izzie heard her bedroom door slowly open and shut, followed by three sets of tiny feet walking along the hardwood floor. 

“Izzie. Izzie. Wake up.”

Mike had gotten very good about not usually waking her up. But when he did, at least he did it quietly. She looked at her phone, it was 5:15. One minute before her alarm was meant to go off. Izzie had to be at morning practice by 6 am but she never showered or did her hair or makeup until after practice so she could usually sleep in a little later. 

She was surprised to see that all three kids were still here. Normally her mom will drop them off at the school’s morning program. Basically they go play in the gym for a few hours before school, with other kids whose parents have to work early. Izzie’s mom had gotten a job at a mattress store, but she still would be gone all sorts of weird hours. She would say she had to close until 1 am and then open the next morning at six. Izzie knew something wasn't right.

_ No mattress store has those kinds of hours. _

Izzie, still half asleep rolled to the edge of the bed and sat up. 

“Where’s mom?”

Gwen looked up at her and whispered

“Mommy has a headache. We need to be very quiet”

_ Great. The only place mommy was closing down last night was the bar. _

Izzie got up and stormed into her mother's room. 

“I hear you have a headache? Out late last night huh?”

Izzie’s mother just rolled on her other side so her daughter couldn't see her face.

“Are you going to get up and get them ready for school?”

Silence

“Mom, I have practice!”

Silence.

Izzie wished that she could feel disappointed in the situation but honestly she was used to it. This was sadly becoming her normal. She walked back into her room and gathered all 3 kids in the bathroom. She brushed her baby sister’s teeth and got her dressed. She then instructed the two older kids to do the same for themselves. 

She went back to her room with Lydia and pulled out her phone as she tried to get dressed herself.

**Hey Coach, I won’t be able to make it practice this morning. Something came up with my mom and I have to take the kids to school.**

Izzie always felt awful doing this, but she felt lucky that Crowley was understanding about everything. She was out of school a lot last year, so of course the coach noticed. She never pryed or asked any intrusive questions. She only asked Izzie if everything was alright, and asked if she needed to contact anyone about what was going on at home. Izzie of course said everything was fine. Crowley knew this wasn't true, but she also knew that Izzie would never hesitate to let her know if things got real bad.

**Crowley: It’s okay, but just know that you are running extra sprints tomorrow. **

Izzie couldn't help but smile. That was such a Crowley thing to say. She picked up Lydia, gathered the kids and headed out the door. As Izzie placed the baby in her car seat, she spit up all over the only clean uniform Izzie had.

_ Great. _

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

Izzie groaned as she sat on the couch in the Gardner's living room. Izzie had texted Casey very vaguely this morning, but the girls hadn't really had time to talk about everything the day had to offer. The two sat side by side, as Izzie drank water, and Casey was indulging in a bag of cheetos. Their training diets could not be more different.

"I cannot wait to get out of here. My mom had another headache this morning, which meant I had to get all three kids ready for school."

"Hmm."

Casey shook her head in disbelief, but it was clear the taller girl wasn't understanding the frustrations that Izzie faced this morning. She grabbed the collar of her Clayton uniform.

"This - This is baby barf."

“Ew.”

Evan’s laugh rang from the kitchen. As wonderful as it was to be able to spend time with Casey, today izzie would also have to spend time with Evan. But, she was trying to be a good friend, and this is what that entailed.

“Cheetos!”

Evan grabbed one Cheeto out of the bag and sat down on the couch seat opposite of Izzie.

“I just need to get done with school and move far, far away.”

Evan may have been sharing a couch with the girls, but Izzie’s focus was solely on Casey. 

“Where would you go?”

_ Where would I go? Literally anywhere as long as it isn't this town, with my house, and my mother.” _

Izzie looked at the taller girl, and noticed her lips were covered in crumbs. Her mind wandered before she quickly snapped back into the conversation at hand.

“New Orleans. Barcelona. What's the furthest place from here? Mars?”

Mars did seem like the most logical place to escape to these days.

“Oh, this is fun. Where would you go? Name three places.”

Once again, this question was only directed towards Casey, who was biting down on a cheeto with just her teeth to avoid the dust covering her lips.

“Umm Dublin, because Irish accents.”

_ Makes Sense  _

Casey had an awful irish accent, but she could randomly use it from time to time, and Izzie secretly loved it.

“San Francisco…..and Cape Town.”

Izzie could picture Casey sitting on the beach just basking in the African Sun.

“Oh Yea.”

“Cape Town?”

Izzie had forgotten that Evan was even in the room. The sound of his voice made her jump a little.

“I think you mean Cape Cod. Cape Cod.”

_ What in the hell? He can’t be serious. _

“No, the one in South Africa.”

“Oh, right, yeah, yeah, I know that.”

_ Oh...He was serious. _

Casey turned to face Evan, and Izzie could instantly feel the small distance between them. She hadn’t noticed it before, but she has been fiddling with the pillow almost touching the taller girl’s arm this entire time. She still didn’t move her hand away.

“Where would you go, three cities?”

Casey was now bringing Evan fully into the conversation.

“Three? - Um, maybe Providence.”

“What?”

Izzie could not believe what she was hearing. Out of all the places in the world, Evan wanted to go to Providence?

“Yeah, Providence is nice.”

Casey quickly turned to Evan, she was even in disbelief.

“Dude, that's like two hours from here.”

Evan clearly couldn’t see why this was an issue.

“Yeah. So what? They've got a good minor league baseball team.”

_ The Pawtucket Red Sox had a losing record 4 out of the past 5 seasons.  _

“Oh, my God.”

The door opens and Mrs. Gardner walked in, arms full of reusable grocery bags. 

“Hey, Mrs. Gardner, quick, three places you wanna live and prepare to be judged harshly. And Providence is taken.”

She didn’t even have to think about the answer.

“Tokyo, Bruges, Sydney.”

“Oh, good ones.”

All three teenagers were taken aback by the answers. Izzie took a small sip of her water as Mrs. Gardner continued on. 

“Of course when I was your age, I only wanted to live in New York.”

Izzie gulped her water and spit a small remaining ice cube back into the cup. 

“Why didn't you go?”

The older woman set her groceries down on the counter.

“I did. I lived there for five years after college.”

_ Elsa is full of surprises today. _

Casey clearly felt the same way as all 3 of them were turned completely around facing the kitchen.

“Wait a minute. Mom-were you-could it be? Were you cool?”

Izzie couldn’t help but laugh. She loved these interactions between Casey and Mrs. Gardner. But it was also something we wish she could have with her mom. 

“Very. I even wore fingerless gloves.”

The thought of Mrs. Garner in fingerless gloves was something Izzie never thought she would be imagining.

“I wore them to five different Fleetwood Mac concerts with your dad, but you know, i'd like to think I'm still pretty cool”

Casey turned back around and set her glass on the bare wooden coffee table.

“Honey, I don't know why we bother with coasters if you're not gonna use them.”

Casey leaned back into the couch, as Izzie turned around as well.

“And she's back.”

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

Izzie got home and headed straight for her room. Her mom was in the kitchen and yelled out after her. 

“Do you want any dinner? I made mac and cheese!”

She said it so proudly as if she was the only one in the house to master how to make Kraft mac and cheese. Izzie wasn’t hungry anyway, she had already eaten.

“No thanks, Casey’s mom made me dinner.”

I was a bit of a low blow, to have your daughter point out how well another woman is parenting her, but it was something she needed to realize. She was failing as a mother. 

“You were with that girl every moment of every day all summer, and now her mom is making you dinner?”

Izzie was shocked that her mom knew where she was all summer, but entertained that her mom also didn't realize that Mrs. Gardner had been making her dinner all summer as well. 

“Don’t you think you two should take a little break from each other now that school started, maybe you could go out with Nate again!’

“Why would you say that? You have never even met Nate, or Casey for that matter!”

Who was her mom to tell her who she should or shouldn't spend her time with. Her mother’s friends were all drunks...or worse.

“Oh, I just meant- Well, you wouldn't want people to get the wrong idea about you two.”

“What do you mean by wrong idea?”

Izzie asked the question, but she already knew the answer. For someone who hated being judged, she sure did an awful lot of it. And for someone who was too high or hungover to go to church, she certainly used religion as an excuse to look down on people so they couldn't look down on her first. 

“You know what- Never mind. I'm going to bed.”

Izzie sat down at her desk and opened her laptop. She needed to get out of this town. She needed to get away from her mother. She knew school and track was the only way to do this. Her speed was her golden ticket out. She opened google and searched “Clayton Prep Track Scholarships.” As she scrolled, her eyes got wider and her jaw dropped more. She couldn't believe what she was seeing. 

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

Izzie left History early so she could be waiting for the taller girl as soon as she got out of class. This was big news that needed to be told in person, however there was not a lot of time in between classes to tell it. She finally saw Casey’s head above the others walking out the door. It took everything in Izzie not to run right up to her. She settled on a very very quick walk. 

She was walking so fast she arrived into Casey’s personal space quicker than she realized. Casey took a half step backwards, but even that small yet sudden distance couldn't stop Izzie from smiling.

“What's up, crazy?”

“I figured it out.”

Izzie felt a little crazy in the moment, but she kept on talking.

“I know how to get us out of here.”

“Clayton? I don't have a problem getting out. It's staying in that I have trouble with.”

Izzie rolled her eyes. Casey was clearly proud of that one, and it was adorable, but this was no time for jokes. She softly grabbed the taller girl by the arm and guided her in the direction of English. In doing so, Izzie’s face moved extremely close to Casey’s. She could smell her “Ocean Breeze” lotion. 

_ STAY FOCUSED _

“Shut up and listen. Almost every year UCLA recruits a student from Clayton on a track scholarship. Two years ago, they took three kids.”

“That's crazy”

“I know!”

Casey seemed too calm, Izzie really needed to explain this better.

“And their coach is, like, best friends with Coach Crowley.”

“Crowley has friends?”

_ Again with the jokes? Does she not understand how big of a deal this is for us? _

Casey. We could go together. The two of us... to California.

_ The two of us.. _

A smirk grew on Casey’s face as she stopped in the middle of the hallway.

“Wow”

_ Now she’s getting it. _

“I know, right? And this scout was gonna be at regionals in a couple of months.”

Although part of Izzie was thinking  _ Of course a scout will be at regionals,  _ the other half was convinced this entire thing was fate.

“Do you think that they'd take us?”

“If we train like crazy and get our times down. We're juniors, this is our chance to impress them.”

Izzie was prepared to put the work in, and based on Casey’s quick rebound from surgery, the taller girl would be too. 

“LA. I don't know anything about it except that it's very far away from Elsa.”

_ She’s in. _

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

Izzie laid on the floor of her room stretching out her back. Her phone buzzed on her night stand. She unlocked the screen to see the UCLA Bruins track uniform. 

**Newton: I think we would look great in blue!**

**Are you really on board with this? This isn't too crazy of an idea?**

**Newton: It's not crazy! It's our dream to get out of here, and you know what they say about dreaming? Dream Big!**

_ Our dream. _

**Newton: So yes. I am on board!**

**100% ?**

**Newton: I am on the UCLA Train. I have purchased my ticket, stowed away my luggage, and I'm prepared for the ride.**

Izzie had been smiling all day. She imagined her life in California with Casey. Would she always smile this much in California? For the first time in a long time she was the light at the end of the tunnel, and she really had faith she could get out. 

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

Izzie ran out from under the bleacher seating onto the track lugging her duffel bag. She lost track of time looking up UCLA record times, and was now slightly late. Luckily Casey was still sitting on the bench lacing up her shoes.

“Hey.”

“Hey.”

Every time they ever said hello to each other it was almost as if they hadn’t seen each other in years, even if it had only been 5 minutes. Every greeting was laced by a genuine, yet suppressed excitement to see the other girl. Or at least that is what Izzie felt. 

“Are you cool with meeting a half hour early to train?”

Looking at those records really had Izzie anxious. The times were so fast, and she knew getting recruited was not going to be easy. She dropped her duffel on the ground, and kicked it under the bench.

“We can do extra conditioning and practice passes. We gotta step up our game.”

Izzie crossed her arms as Casey looked back at Izzie, with a black stare. 

“Yeah, sure. Maybe.”

_ You have got to be kidding me. _

“You're already changing your mind about LA, aren't you?”

Izzie uncrossed her arms, and extended them straight down until she could grip the edge of the metal bench. She needed something to hold onto for this upcoming tsunami of disappointment.

“No.”

_ Lies. _

“Um I ran the idea by Evan. I told him he should come with us.”

Izzie didn’t realize that Evan was going to be part of this adventure. But if that would have meant she would go, Izzie would pack Evan’s bags for him. 

“And he's not into it? I'm not surprised.”

For a split second Izzie can feel a single tear forming. She looked away from Casey, and willed herself to stop. She finally lets go of the bench and returns her arms to their crossed position. 

“I mean, if we were going to college in Providence What does he want to stay here for anyway? What does Evan, like, do?”

Izzie worried how Casey would react to these questions, but they needed to be asked. She was not going to let the most important person in her life, toss away an opportunity like this just to stay with her hometown and be with her high school boyfriend that is too afraid to leave the state. 

“I mean, he works at Don's, and he's just figuring it out.”

_ Oh, she actually took that really well.  _

“Which is code for doing nothing.”

_ Maybe I went a little too far with that one. _

Izzie held on to the bench yet again, preparing herself for Hurricane Casey to defend Evan with every ounce of breath she had. Instead she got a smile, and a laugh.

“I hate you.”

“I know.”

Izzie stood up and leaned towards Casey, once again underestimating just how close they were. 

“Come on.”

As frustrating of a conversation that was, with no real answers, and only more questions. Izzie left it feeling a sense of relief. Evan was a good guy, a great guy. She never really had any reason to dislike him other than her own selfish reasons. But now, she could say with absolute certainty, that even though Evan is a great guy, Newton could do better. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, let me know if you love it!


	4. Episode 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzie avoids home, and spends the day with a different type of parent than she is used to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning; Mild Abuse, Verbal Abuse, Harsh Language

Izzie woke up the sounds of cabinet doors slamming shut, dishes being thrown in the sink, and glassware shattering. The sounds were so loud that the music coming from her headphones couldn't drown it out. She was happy the kids had spent the night at their grandma’s house. Friday and Saturday were her mom’s worst days, and they didn’t need to be around for that. Izzie herself arrived late enough last night that her mom had already passed out. But put on the music just in case she decided to wake up for a round two. 

Izzie wanted to hide out in bed all day, or sneak out her bedroom window. She really did not want to have to deal with her mom today. 

“GET YOUR LAZY ASS OUT OF BED”

_ Well...There goes that.  _

Izzie’s mom crashed through the unlocked door, as if she were a swat team during a raid. 

“I SAID GET YOUR ASS OUT OF BED!”

Izzie felt her mother’s hands on her feet, pulling her out of the bed. 

“MOM! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!?”

Izzie made her way to her feet, as her mom now grabbed her hands, and pulled her towards the kitchen. On her way she passed by the dining room, and caught a glimpse of the living room area. Both looked like a hurricane had just passed through. As the two arrived to the kitchen Izzie could see that it was no better. Empty beer and liquor bottles everywhere, Broken glass in the sink and the floor. Cigarette butts in coffee mugs. She knew her mom couldn’t have done all of this by herself, and for a moment she panicked about who was in her house last night. 

“Look around young lady. Look at this mess.”

Izzie’s mom looked at her as if she were the one on trial. 

“If you are going to have your friends over, the least you could do is clean up after yourselves.”

Now Izzie was confused. Was her mom really blaming her for this mess? How could someone forget what they did the night before like this? As she looked around she saw a used needle on the counter.

_ That’s how. _

“Mom, I didn’t do this! I didn’t have anyone over, you did!”

“THAT IS BULLSHIT!”

Izzie took a small step back away from her mother. 

“You had your rich friends over huh? Showing them how us poor people party?”

Her mother’s volume lowered but her tone became more harsh. Izzie felt words coming out of her before she could stop them. 

“Oh yeah mom, We all sat here and got hammered last night, I showed them how, just like mommy taught me!”

Her mom ignored the insult, almost as if she didn’t hear it, and continued on.

“Do all your friends know what you and that girl do behind closed doors?”

They had not done anything more than hold hands one time, but Izzie knew exactly where this was going.

_ Casey _

“Mom, what are you talking about?”

“They would be disgusted if they found out. You know that right? Disgusted, just like i am with you every fucking day.”

Izzie felt the tears form as she backed away further from this monster, she knew as mother. She felt her back touch the fridge handle behind her. 

Her mother’s eyes softened as if she just realized what she had said out loud. She began to walk away. 

“Clean up this fucking mess.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Izzie pulled into the Gardner’s driveway. This home had quickly become her safe place over the summer, and she hoped to find refuge here once again. As she made her way up to the door, she realized that she had no excuse for actually being here, Casey wasn’t even home. Before her brain could tell her to stop, she was knocking on the front door. She could hear a conversation occurring inside as Elsa opened the door. 

“Izzie, hi.”

“Hi, Mrs. Gardner.”

Izzie began speaking as if she had rehearsed the entire drive over. 

“I know Casey isn't here, but I was in the neighborhood, dropping my brother off at his friend's  house so I thought I should come by.”

_No one_ _ just stops by, think of something more! _

Izzie felt the weight in her bag, and quickly came up with her reason to be there. 

“I accidentally took…”

She pulled her backpack towards her front, and pulled out the large red text book that had been haunting her math challenged brain since the first day. 

“..Casey's math book yesterday.”

“Oh, okay.”

Elsa took the book and flipped it over to examine the back cover. Izzie hoped that she didn't investigate much more, or she would quickly realize that Izzie’s name was on the inside. 

“Yeah.”

_ Well that lasted long.. _

“So…”

_ I could go running in the park, or maybe just sit in the car somewhere. Anything but go home. _

“I should go home.”

Mrs. Gardner looked into Izzie’s eyes, as if she knew the real reason the young girl was standing at her doorstep. 

“You know, we could really use your help.”

A wave of relief swept over Izzie.

“We're doing this big clothing drive,”

She looked past Elsa and saw piles of clothes spread all across the living room. 

“And you have such a great sense of style.”

_ Facts _

“Give us a hand?”

Izzie could not thank Elsa enough in that moment. She smiled as she passed through the door, and arrived back into her safe haven. 

“Okay. Yeah.”

“Question: was the previous occupant  of this house named Earl?”

In the middle of the living room, was a middle aged woman close to Mrs. Gardner’s age. She wore a nice button down and looked like she may be the type to complain about expired coupons at the grocery store. Behind her, was another woman who looked a bit more laid back. 

“Or...Pearl?”

_ Do people normally know who lived in the house before them? _

“Or...Worrell?”

The woman in the back stopped what she was doing.

“Worrell? Is that even a name?”

As Izzie set her jacket down Elsa finally spoke up.

“Nobody here was ever named Worrell.”

“Hmm. I think you're wrong.”

_ I think I am in over my head here.  _

  
  


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  
  


The other women who Izzie had learned were Luisa and Kathy had already left, and Izzie was still sorting through clothes as Elsa sat on the couch drinking coffee. It had been a long day for them both, but Izzie was in no rush to go home, so she would keep helping as long as Mrs. Gardner would have her. She turned and picked up a small crochet sweater for a small child. Her youngest sister would fit into this.

“I made that.”

Elsa spoke soft but proudly.

“It's ridiculously adorable.”

She wasn’t lying.

“Hmm. Casey refused to wear it, of course.”

She imagined a young Casey running around the house avoiding putting on the sweater at any cost. It made Izzie smile

“But she did put it on her stuffed zebra for a while so I consider that a win.”

Elsa, set her coffee down as Izzie folded up the small sweatshirt. 

“Okay, nope, you are not giving this one away.”

As she set it down, she picked up a larger purple t-shirt with a picture of a baked potato on it. 

_ Sal E. Sour Cream...I always wanted to go there. _

Izzie held the shirt on display for Elsa, looking for the story behind it. 

“Oh, I remember that day.”

Izzie sat down on the couch, ready for the story.

“Casey got in trouble at school for acting out. She was so upset about it.”

_ Acting out at school, I guess not much has changed. _

“So the next day I picked her up early from school and I took her to Sal E. Sour Cream.

_ My mom would have taken me home and yelled at me for hours.  _

“And we had lunch together, and it was special, because we could never go there  as a family because Sam hated it. you know, because of the lights and the noise and...Oh, she was so happy.”

Izzie could see in Elsa’s eyes the happiness in this memory. She could see the unconditional love for her kids in those eyes. Izzie never saw that in her mothers. She fumbled with her earring and tried to turn away to hide the tears.

“Oh, honey, honey, I'm sorry.”

She finally allowed herself to cry.

“No, no, no, it's okay. I don't know why I'm crying, it's so stupid.”

She did know why she was crying. But Izzie learned pretty early on in life that expressing her emotions usually got her into more trouble.

“No, it's not stupid.”

She felt safe with Elsa, not as safe as with Casey, but she felt like Mrs. Gardner would protect her, and at least listen to her feelings.

“I don't know, I... I guess I just wish I had a childhood like that.”

_ I can't believe I said that out loud.  _

“Me too.”

Izzie looked up slightly shocked. 

_ Elsa is too perfect to have had a bad childhood. She isn't damaged like me. _

“Growing up, well...it wasn't a great environment.”

Elsa began fidgeting with the sweater. This was clearly something she did not talk about often.

“I think that's why, I always tried so hard to make it different for Sam and Casey, you know. To give them, like, the perfect, perfect childhood. I probably went overboard,

I mean, I probably still do.”

_ Definitely still do. _

Elsa put her hand gently on the side of Izzies face, giving her no choice but to look the older woman in the eye. 

“I'm gonna tell you something that I wish someone had told me. Our door is always open.”

Izzie felt the tears beginning to creep again. This time from happiness. This house, these people, she had found her sanctuary. 

“No matter what you need, anything at all, even if it's a place to stay.”

Izzie knew why Casey hated Elsa so much, but she couldn't hate her the same way. Not now. Casey had no idea just how good she had it. She wished she could pack up all of her things and move in the Gardner’s right then and there. But she knew that was something she could never do. Too many laws, and her mother would never let her go.

“Thanks. But I'm really scared of ghosts. So I don't think so.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess whos back!!!
> 
> I am so sorry for taking so long!!! I hope this was worth the wait!!!
> 
> If you want to see why it took forever to update check out my   
Tumblr @turnyourwoundsintowisdom   
TikTok: @brandywithy 
> 
> and let me know if you are from here and I will def. follow back!!!!

**Author's Note:**

> If you love it, let me know!!
> 
> You can follow me on tumblr @TurnYourWoundsIn2Wisdom for more updates!


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